Moments in Strange Modeling

No, not that. I will let others speak on that front. I'm referring to this video from the LA Times (got this from "Awful Announcing"):



This man has no respect for himself or the newspaper industry.

How do you lose to the Netherlands when you're a world baseball power?

I think I have an idea. Come on a trip with me through the internet.

The Heyman Cometh!

It's a few days late but I feel inspired to do a little humbling from miles away. Let's get a taste of Jon Heyman's Daily Scoop:

The stunning thing about this free-agent market isn't that there are still about 100 players without jobs, it's that at least a dozen of the unemployed are excellent players in their prime.

It sounds like you have done your homework on this. I'm intrigued. Tell me more!

A dynamic lineup could be constructed with outfielders Bobby Abreu, Adam Dunn and Garret Anderson, second baseman Orlando Hudson, shortstop Orlando Cabrera, third baseman Joe Crede and catcher Jason Varitek joining Ramirez. A very solid rotation would be formed with Oliver Perez, Ben Sheets, Randy Wolf, Jon Garland (EDITOR'S NOTE: Garland agreed to a deal with Arizona after press time) and Braden Looper. And Juan Cruz, one of the best set-up men in baseball, remains available, as well. If you play Dunn at first, all that's missing are a center fielder and a closer.

Ignoring the fact that you're only 11 spots short of a 25-man roster, I say that's not a bad collection you have. Quite flawed (poor defense, injury concerns, mediocre peripherals, etc) but OK. That said, I don't know if I consider the majority of those guys in their prime. Heck, the guys in their primes don't shout "breakout". More like 2 WAR (wins above replacement) additives, useful but not worth big bucks.

Beyond all the current stars, there are several Hall-of-Famers-to-be with their hands out. Some think Jeff Kent's retirement was hastened by this awful market. Kenny Rogers looks likely to call it quits, and others might, too.

While I agree that Jeff Kent will be a HOFer and is deserving of that(although one person whose opinion I respect makes me less sure of that), how in the world does a guy with a career FIP (fielding indepedent pitching on an ERA scale) of 4.38 like the Gambler have a plaque in his future?

There doesn't seem to be a lot of action on all-time great Ken Griffey Jr., or for that matter, sure Hall of Famer Frank Thomas. Pedro Martinez, Tom Glavine, Moises Alou, Ivan Rodriguez and Nomar Garciaparra are among other former greats still available. It's like a Who's Who of 1990s baseball out there.

Yup, more guys in their "prime". How far are you willing to stretch things, Jon?

2. Bobby Abreu. He is one of three players in history with a .400 on-base percentage, 300 steals and 200 home runs (Barry Bonds and Rickey Henderson are the others) and one of three with 100 RBIs in each of the last three years (Alex Rodriguez and Albert Pujols are the others), yet for some reason Raul Ibanez, whose numbers aren't even in Abreu's ballpark, was the more popular pick this winter

Congrats, Abreu! You've gone from underrated to overrated. No wonder you're frozen out.
Also, shouldn't the Ibanez signing be an indictment of the GM who signed him?

8. Garret Anderson. Here's another terrific hitter caught in a nightmare of a hitting market. He's been among the more productive outfielders in the AL over the last several years, and while he has seemingly been around forever, he's still only 36.

Beyond the Boxscore put it best. Terrific? If you are just talking about RBI and batting average, then yes.

Given what you've mentioned before, I'm betting you realize that there's more than that. Heck, you don't even have to get into your dreaded VORP!

Oh yeah, once again, 36 is not "in his prime".

9. Joe Crede. He's said to have a clean bill of health, though past back trouble obviously is worrisome to some. The Giants, Twins and Rangers have shown interest.

One of these teams is not like the other. One of these teams just doesn't belong.

I'm sorry, but I can't accept this work. Please redo.

It's a Conspiracy, I Tell You

At least according to former Royals pitcher and current Dugout Central writer Doug Bird. I'll just let you enjoy this for yourself. Beware of the tin foil.

For someone who pitched in the majors, I have a hard time believing that one could be so willing to accept a conspiracy so easily. The last paragraph is especially ridiculous:

The 2008 ALCS nearly saw another Boston miracle comeback. But then Tampa Bay managed to turn back Boston’s momentum with a game seven victory, getting the former doormats into the World Series for the first time. Did Major League baseball decide the game needed this new Tampa Bay fan enthusiasm more than it needed the safe and always paying Red Sox nation? Although Fox couldn’t have been enthused with the promise of poor ratings, might there be something more devious behind Tampa’s ascension? Is it just coincidence that Tampa’s new, good fortunes come at a time when the team is trying to get a deal for a new stadium?

Let me take a stab...YES IT'S A COINCIDENCE!!

If you thought Sal Paolantonio was an objective, soft-spoken, classy guy. . .

. . . you were wrong.



Wow. Even with the things that are right this is so wrong.

Mike Smith Sucks for Not Reffing Better

Tony Kornheiser likes to be angry. He likes to blame people for doing stupid things, often that aren't stupid. And he likes to be adamant about it.

He also likes to be wrong (apparently).

On PTI today, he decided to RIP Mike Smith and blame him for this:



I'm not quoting because it's just not necessary, but as the replay of the show will be in about 40 minutes or so, you can tune in and watch it yourself. With a loud, condescending tone, he decided to say Mike Smith's by-the-book strategy to use his time outs so he could get the ball back with 2:22 left in the game and a chance to win was stupid. Why? Because he didn't save a time out so that he could challenge the play on the field if the refs made a bad call. Which they did.

What? So. . . the coach should not use his time outs as best he can because the refs might make a mistake? They can't play normal strategy because someone else might screw up? We're going to blame a coach for doing everything right because the officials don't (and the NFL rules are ridiculous for the situation)?

I'm seen Kornheiser be wrong, and I've seen him be angrily misguided. This is bad, even for him, though.

Brief ATH on ATH note

Can someone let me know who won the World Series 150 years ago? (re: Reali)

Henry Aaron Rolls in His Grave (WITHOUT EVEN DYING FIRST!)

The MLB announcement of the Hank Aaron Award includes a very blatant lie:

The Hank Aaron Award officially recognizes the most outstanding offensive performer in the American and National Leagues.

This is not just a blatant lie, it's a vicious lie. I know because this man won it. And he was not, by any stretch of the imagination, the best offensive performer in the National League.

The other winner was none other than Euclis, the Greek God of Walks himself. I have trouble seeing him ahead of Milton Bradley in terms of quality, or Grady Sizemore in terms of quantity, or Alex Rodriguez in terms of both, but he was third in wOBA, so whatever. Weird, but it's fine.

Ramirez, though, was 19th in EqA and 20th in EqR. THAT is the best offensive player in the NL?

Want to limit it just to hitting and not offense, as the award claims? Fine, he 15th in wOBA, 15th in Runs Created, 20th in GPA, and his numbers like a 128 OPS+, 7.2 RC/27, .581 OWP and 2.4 Batting Wins don't even register on the Baseball Reference leader board.

Look, that's a good season, but it's not even top 10, let alone anywhere near the best. Especially when Albert Pujols was worth two Kevin Youkilises (yes, that includes defense, get over it). Pujols was worth, like, fifty more runs than Ramirez. His Baseball Reference page looks like something out of a video game.

How does this sort of crap happen?

Fans cast 230,000 votes at MLB.com, the official Web site of Major League Baseball, in this, the sixth consecutive year that fans have had a voice in selecting the award winners in this fashion.

Oh.

But still, according to Baseball Almanac, the fans are only 30% of the ballot. So where does the rest come from? Wikipedia?

Fan's votes accounted for 30% of the points, with broadcaster's and analyst's votes accounting for the other 70%.

So there you go. The brilliant minds of fans and announcers deciding who is about the 15th or so best hitter in the league and giving him an award named after one of the greatest, classiest and most significant players in baseball history.


This bothers me to a large degree because, if this award was treated with any sort of dignity and seriousness, it would be a great answer to the idiotic "the pitchers have their own award so the MVP should just be for hitters!!!" brigade.

Jim Rome Just Discovered the Rays

I'm not sure why I would ever watch Jim Rome is Burning, but I did today. I'm not sure why. Anyway, Rome had this to say about the Rays.

The Rays are who we thought they were,

Nice. A joke that hasn't gotten old, but incorrect in this case if you keep reading.

not the guys who were trying to knock over the monster in Fenway.

No, Jim. That's exactly who they were. They were the team who finished fourth in the American League in home runs hit. In a pitchers' park. Doesn't that sound like a team that hits a lot of home runs?

They hit almost as many home runs as the Texas Rangers. I don't think anyone is confusing the Rangers with a small ball team.

That's not where these guys live, they were built to do it with pitching, speed and defense,

And power and patient hitting.

and it was all on Game 2 of the World Series.

But not the power.

They don't wait for someone to pop a three runner, they play small ball, not long ball.

They were fourth in home runs and 13th in batting average. So a relatively large number of their hits left the park (in a pitchers' park) and they had a relatively low number of other hits. They were, however, sixth in on base percentage. Does this or does it not paint a picture of a patient team that scores a lot of rums on homeruns? Sort've like an Earl Weaver team.

Guess what team was LAST in the league in sacrifice hits. That's right: the Rays. If the fact that they scored three runs on outs last night is an idication of small ball, every team is small ball! Including patient, power-hitting teams like the Rays.

Beyond all that, the Rays are a renowned progressive front office and anyone who follows sports FOR A LIVING should be aware of this. As in: not a team that embraces small ball.


The Rays have a lot of talents, they can win even when they're not hitting home runs because they have speed and a great defense and pitching. That doesn't make them a small ball team.

The fact that a major member of the sports media is so unfamiliar with a team playing in the World Series that he makes things up that are flat-out and obviously wrong should be an embarassment.

The Patriots Will Win Tonight Because Two Injured Quarterbacks are Hurt and Another One Sucks

Stuart Scott's reasoning for picking the Patriots tonight on Monday Night Football:

In Matt Cassell's career he has backed up Carson Palmer, Matt Leinart and Tom Brady. Of those four, he's the only one playing this week, so I'm picking the Patriots.

The janitor at my local McDonalds has been a janitor at three other restaurants in town. Two of those chefs are dead (both in beaver-related incidents, tragic), and one of them is no longer licensed to prepare food due to health violations.

So I'm hiring this janitor to cater my Halloween party.

But can Brad Pitt hock cars?

One of the first things I thought of with yesterday's exciting announcement that Brad Pitt might play Billy Beane in Moneyball: the Epic Motion Picture Event of the Century was this:


I feel like for those of us hardcore Moneyball fans out there Pitt should reenact this commercial to show us what he can do. How close can he come to this dramatic character?



Now THAT is the best looking and smartest GM in baseball (just ask the Mets' secretary). It's a good thing the Beane Counter isn't playing himself, eh?


P.S. Scroll past this and look at Rook's LVP post. Look at that formatting!

How to Win Arguments and Influence Stat Boys

Let me present to you today's winner on Around the Horn (the other ATH): Tim Cowlishaw. He won, in part, thanks to getting points for this statement:

There was never any indication from his agent that he would have played for a reasonable amount of money. It's not like you could have gone out and signed him for a million dollars. He wanted a ton of money.

And if you keep un on your sports news, you know what's wrong with this. First, there's the fact that a team couldn't know how much Bonds wanted to play for without first making him an offer.

Second, there's the fact that, you know, what Cowlishaw said was flat-out wrong.

Bonds is willing to play for the MLB minimum. . .

Well, that seems to stand in stark contrast to what Cowlishaw just said. And this was no small sports story. And Cowlishaw's job is to follow sports stories. So, somehow, this escaped both he and Tony Reali.

So how do you put up the best argument in a sports debate? Simple! Don't have a clue what you're talking about, allow raging bias to get in the way of reason, and make sure the judge of the debate doesn't know what you're talking about, either.

The More Important the Play, the More Important Your Gut

With under two minutes go go and San Francisco inside the 10 yard line trailing 17-6 game, Seattle's Deion Grant picked off a J.T. O'Sullivan pass to seemingly end the scoring threat.

BUT WAIT! There was a flag for pass interference, and the play was eventually overturned.

First, however, the referees got together to firmly make sure this most impactful of calls was made correctly. Makes sense, right? This is a game-changing situation, it's good that the refs make sure they get it right. Correct?

Not according to Darryl Johnson, who cried out that, "this is too much discussion for a play this critical!"






















Wait. . .
















. . . HUH?!

No, Moose. That's exactly why there should be MORE discussion. Because the play was INCREDIBLY critical. If it's MORE critical than it's LESS important to get it right?

Too many concussions, big boy?

Someone explain this to me.

These people look like the exact same person to me. They're both under-sized, scrappy, over achievers full of heart and grit. They go from one team to another and fulfill a role. They are both clearly albinos and have high pitched voices.

What's weird to me is that one is constantly overrated and adulated to a nauseating degree. The other is consistently underrated and people can't wait to replace him.

What's going on here? Are they not the same person? Why aren't they treated the same?

This is all just an elaborate practical joke.

Right?

Chad Johnson has legally changed his name to Chad Ocho Cinco. He said he'd do it, and I didn't believe it. I still don't.

I. . . just. . . I guess if you want to be remembered forever, that's one way to do it.

Why, on a blog that does not exist for reporting, do I create a reporting post that tells you nothing you didn't already know? What do I have to offer you?

This: the ridiculously hilarious and surreal Chad Ocho Cinco discussion page on Wikipedia.

Christmas in. . . August?

This maybe doesn't deserve its own post, but I'm hoping someone out there can help me.

I'm up late watching a re-air of the US vs. the Netherlands in baseball. In the top of the third, a Netherlands player fails on a pop fly in foul territory (in such a way that helps me understand why this is the last time Baseball will be in the Olympics). After he drops it, the stadium starts loudly playing. . . Jingle Bells?!

Why? Can someone out there help me with this? And it wasn't a quick tune, either, it was the whole song. And it was loud and clear, definitely Jingle Bells. Please? Anyone?


Also, watching this game reminds me of what it was like to watch Expos games. There's no one in the stands, so you can litterally hear individual conversations and hecklers. There's some guy who's louder than the announcers who still thinks it's cool to say "no batta no batta no batta SWING!"

. . . maybe I won't miss Olympic baseball. . .

Spain's Olympic Basketball Team Fouls Out with Ad

From The Guardian

"Spain's Olympic basketball teams have risked upsetting their Chinese hosts by posing for a pre-Games advert making slit-eyed gestures. The advert for a courier company, which is an official sponsor of the Spanish Basketball Federation, occupied a full page in the sports daily Marca, the country's best-selling newspaper."

As a kid, I remember this thing some of the other students used to do where they would do the same gesture as a way to tell the difference between the Japanese and Chinese. Though I didn't know about stereotypes or political correctness at the time, I had a feeling that it was pretty pointless and dumb.

Congratulations! You have now confirmed my elementary school hunch.

Olympic coverage often makes me go "huh?"

Does anyone here watch the olympics to hear a former tennis player explain Pandas to us and why, if you go to China, that's the most important site to see?

Anyone?