Paragraphs are Great...

Unless you're Mr. Plaschke in this article about Andruw Jones:

"Are you saying you're sorry?"

For being below replacement level in '08 in under half a season? I'm sure Andruw does. If not, he needs a lesson in humility.

Later this day at Surprise Stadium, he will stroke through a fastball from new Dodger Claudio Vargas, driving it off the left-field bullpen roof for his first home run of the spring.

A nasty bite of the hand that still feeds him $22 million.

This is spring training right? The monetary loss hurts, no doubt. Even so, I highly doubt the McCourts are going to rue that home run.

"Are you saying you're sorry?"

He's not hard of hearing, Plaschke!

Are you sorry for showing up at spring training looking like a blue manatee? Sorry for not working hard enough to fix that weight? Sorry for ripping the fans who booed you for that weight? Sorry for asking to be put on the disabled list so you could disappear from those boos?

Unless I've heard otherwise, he did have a legitimate knee injury. The extra weight didn't help but let's not create phantom injuries. Did you even ask all that?

The first thing you notice about Andruw Jones this spring is the one thing you don't notice.

No belly.

Did that really need to be its own sentence? Heck, that's not even a sentence. I appreciate that you reporters get to do stuff most bloggers are unable/unwilling to do but let's not take that for granted. ;)

"Oh, I lost quite a few pounds," he says. "Somewhere in the 20s."

I need your diet plan, Mr. Jones. Tell me the secret!

Now he loses the weight. Now he hits the home run. Now he is being paid $500,000 plus incentives, the deal of the year if he performs. Wonderful.

You act shocked. Why? Humiliation will do that to people.

He had been the centerpiece winter signing, a slugger who could play a Gold Glove center field and swing a World Series bat, and I even wrote he was a bargain.

I admire the symbolism but what in the world is a "World Series bat"? In theory, if a team makes the World Series, the hitters, no matter how bad, will have a "World Series bat."

Oh, you mean this? Perhaps I underestimated you, Bill. Maybe I should not be so hard on you.

Although he has denied using performance-enhancing drugs, his weight gain and power decrease are classic symptoms of steroid users who suddenly stop.

Oh, never mind. When did weight gain become a "classic symptom"? Weakness, sure. As much as I disagree with his stance on PEDs and the Hall, at least Tom Verducci looks as though he has done some decent research. Where are you?

In his first plate appearance, in a matchup straight from Colletti's worst nightmares, in a duel that represented potentially 83 million lost Dodgers dollars, Jones faced a guy named Jason Schmidt.

Who struck him out looking[sic]

Apology accepted.

I got to use a sic! If this was improper, just notify me.

Somewhere, Rook is undecided who raises his ire more: Plaschke, Andruw, or me.

Congratulations are in Order

Here at ATH, we have a policy of being as objective as possible. We do have our teams and we think we should be open about those teams, but the personal rooting should be left to others we think.

So, since Rook can't do it, let me do it for him. Congratulations on getting to see your team do something against the odds that I've never yet had the chance to enjoy!

Sunday Night Baseball Live Blog Dodgers-Diamondbacks

Here we have a matchup of the top two teams in the NL West. Both will be sending out their respective sinker studs in Lowe (59.8% GB) and Webb (65.5% GB). Incidentally, they are 1-2 in groundball rate

Fangraphs Live Graph

- Pregame note: apparently, cleanup hitters aren't known for a lot of walks and strikeouts.

- If you're reading this blog, cheers to you, Scotty.

- Hey, it's Doogie Howser! I can't believe I actually remember that.

- Now I definitely don't think "James Loney" when I think "cleanup hitter". Sure, he's a 1st baseman and they are often cleanup hitters but Loney is not that guy.

- Groundball #1

- Home run! Ethier says, "F' your stats! This is for the old scout."

- Webb is having some sick movement on his pitches so far. Probably too much. A lot of balls are up to the Dodgers this inning.

- "Consistent" mention #1.

- GB #2 followed by another home run.

- Berroa: he of the 50 OPS+ this season showing why.

- There's #3, an infield single.

- Ah forget counting groundballs. You can look it up on Gameday. :P I'll still count "consistent/consistency/consistently". That was no.2 and 3 there. As soon as I say it, Webb gets the DP.

- Anyone else find it funny that the D-backs have traded for both a popular MSM target (Dunn) and darling (Eckstein)? It's the yin-yang of baseball transactions.

- Woot! A numbnut on the field! (why people do that, I'll never figure it out)

- You do realize that veterans can be inconsistent as well? Not sure that young players as a whole are more inconsistent.

- For tonight, Lowe has more "power" behind his sinker. Webb hasn't even touched 90 since the first while Lowe has.

- "Choking dogs". Is that you, Plaschke?

- Explain that swing, Loney. Yikes.

- You might want to update that score.

- Looks as though Ledezma is reprising the role of "well-traveled lefty" with Arizona now. His 4th team in 14 months.

- Yeah, they have done well against the NL West. That means they are likely to be better. Don't say they will.

- Would you believe that the Angels' magic number is just 9 already?

- Here's the "blowout game" banter fans know and love.

- Man, Gammons gets everything.

- He would mention those Big Red Machine Reds, wouldn't he?

- Um, where did that come from? Of course not everyone can play 2nd base.

- He just had to get Sheffield in there.

- Someone wasn't paying attention to how many outs there were.

- Look deep into these eyes:


A3P% FTW!

- Um, way to tease us.

- An NL MVP discussion without Albert Pujols fails at life. Finally, Jon Miller brings us some sanity. Phat Albert thanks you. Berkman and Utley still await dap.

- Will someone finally start comparing Reynolds to Kingman instead of comparing Dunn to Kingman?

- Wait, they're actually considering Santana? BUT HE DOESN'T HAVE TEH WINZ!!!

- There's plenty of irony there: a mention of Walter Cronkite School of Journalism on ESPN. A school named after a trusted reporter talked about while there's a man in a booth whom people can't trust with something as relatively trivial (considering other matters) as sports.

- Well said, Jon.

- Now that is an RBI that has plenty of value.

- I suppose you could give Wills some "changed the game" credit. Still, I would not wait with bated breath for Wills getting inducted.

- Here's the legend of Jonathan Broxton again making a Sunday Night appearance.

- Btw, that LaRoche "hit" was an error. Hit my ass.

- Joe seemed much more Morganesque tonight than the other three games I've covered on here. I blame David Eckstein!

- Game over. Dodgers win 8-1. Thanks for another edition of the live blog. Look forward to next week's Phillies-Mets clip. That should be rife with Jon and Joe goodness.

Sunday Night Baseball Live Blog Dodgers-Phillies

I know I'm cutting it close with these but trust me, I'll make up for it during the notes. At least, that's my hope. The Phillies look to continue the recent stretch of offense that, as mentioned numerous times during last week's coverage, struggled. The Dodgers try to win this game with the hope to split tomorrow behind Kuroda. (edit: stupid wrap around series)

- Oh good, a montage. Yay!

- Hmm, for some reason, the FanGraphs log for this game isn't up yet. My people want to see graphs, darn it!

edit: Here it is!

- Does anyone else see Scott Elarton with Blanton's motion?

- I wonder where the Dodgers would be without that old scout.

- Darn Olympics screwing up my sleep schedule. X( Good thing they're before classes start or else I'd go mad, hehe. Not that I mind given what I've watched.

- Oh noes! What happened to "slidepiece"? You're moving away from your bread and butter, Joe! *tries not to fall out due to sleepiness*

- High stress inning for Blanton. It's innings like that which make it tough for starters to compile complete games these days. This is where pitch count matters more so than total pitches. That's not to say that total pitches don't matter but the manner that they are compiled is the key.

- Haha, I knew something was up with that plate appearance. Nothing like the 5-ball walk.

- Why do I get the feeling I've seen this before from the Mets?

- To borrow Grif's wording, "Just because" -


- Ahh, running sausages. *pinches self* Yup, still awake.

- On that note, congrats to the Hawaii LL for winning the LLWS. In their honor, Victorino takes a walk.

- That swing was fugly to be kind.

- Yes, I'm still awake. Barely though. :)

- Ah yes, the arbitrary nature of numbers. I mean, it's pretty nice that Martin is linked with future HOFer Pudge Rodriguez but that reeks "cherry picking".

- Aggh, attack of the misplaced production graphic!

- OH NOES, KURODA IZ JINXED!!!11!1

- Good play by Manny. Not that I don't believe Joe, but that's an awfully small sample to consider someone who's traditionally been a below average fielder will make a run at the Gold Glove. Heck, even if Manny were Yaz out there, it's pretty tenuous.

- Don't waffle on me, ESPN. Either be subtle with your upcoming events graphic or go full screen.

- Anyone remember that ESPN: the Magazine commercial with Jeff Kent? Apparently, neither does he so he hits into the GIDP.

- I think those Scream masks were cool 10 years ago. Now? It's a bit cliched. It jumped the shark.

- "He's like Manny Ramirez." Yeah, they're so alike that it's scary.

- Good 3-2 pitch to Ramirez.

- Victorino choosed correctly and makes the play.

- Howard with the excellent play to end the inning and most likely Blanton's night.

- Phew, I felt the wind from that whiff. Wait, nevermind. The fan in the room is on. :P

- My guess is that Myers isn't giving Blanton hair care tips.
edit: Nope, he just told Myers, "I'll show that Goose!"
edit 2: "Ah shucks, why did you do that to me, Charlie?"

- Good play by Nomar. What a peak he had before that wrist surgery in '01. He wasn't bad after that but the couple of years preceding were special.

- I see Big Helmet got picked off. Sorry about that, nature called. Somehow, I managed not to miss much. Thank Matt Kemp!

- Good read by Ethier. Pretty good play by Ruiz to make that close.

- Kent with the two-out single scoring Ethier. 2-1 Dodgers.

- Here's one thing that has bothered me: why would Major League Baseball decide to advertise MLB.TV on MLB.TV? Isn't that preaching to the choir? Exactly how does this help grow the brand? At least they had it on ESPN just now.

- I see Feliz has honed in on his plate discipline.

- OT: Just me speaking but does anyone else feel weird seeing Mao loom behind Bob Costas?

- Neat plays by Burrell and Howard right there.

- Here's Hong-Chi Kuo reprising the role of Scott Proctor and any number of relievers of Torre teams.

- 778 PAs = everyday leadoff hitter on a top offense. That's pretty much it, lol.

- Here's another "What's the point of that?" (aside from me doing these note): showing the score of the game we're currently watching on the ESPN bottomline. Still not getting that.

- Remember how I mentioned the danger of the high stress inning? Boom! (yeah, yeah, post hoc ergo propter hoc, I know. Still fitting)

- Victorino with the leadoff single.

- So a slider?

- I happen to call that the "reach and preach".

- Man, Andy Tracy is still around?

- Wait, that's an old line? Hmm, who knew Broxton already took up some mythic proportions.

- Game tied. 2-all. Nothing more. First extra inning game for the live blog. YAY!

- Bases loaded for the Dodgers, none out. They lose two outs on a DP and the Martin flies out. I've seen that situation in some permutation with my team.

- Heh, a longtime Dodger coaching for the Phillies and a longtime Phillie coaching with the Phillies.

- Beimel : attack of the LOOGY! Attack of the pickoff move.

- He really kicked it up a notch after reaching 1st. *rues being stuck checking out Gameday right when the game is getting good*

- Hamels, FTW? Nope. Feliz, FTW? Yes. 5-2 Phillies win in 11.



Now I sleep. See you next week!